This poem was written on 18 May 1999, on request, for the Pentecost Students’ Association (PENSA) Ladies’ Day on KNUST campus. It was performed by then first year medical student and now Dr. Evelyn Jiagge.
A flower blossoms with alacrity
But its beauty fades with rapidity
Many a relationship begins with vitality
Yet quickly, so quickly comes its sad finality
With singing and hooting of horns
Many a man a dive into marriage takes
Yet soon, and very soon he mourns
As he swims in various unhappiness lakes
For better for worse
For richer for poorer
Till death us do part
Hmm, the nice sound of those words
Do we really appreciate this expression
Do they leave on our mind any impression?
Do we not rather imply
For better for best?
For richer for greater?
Till money us do part?
A relationship is not an experiment
It is very much a commitment
Marriage is not a trek into merriment
It is very much a sacrament
Before you say YES to each other
What do you consider?
Prestige, or character
Stature, or maturity
Admiration, or love
Riches, or wisdom
Can you together
Say the Lord’s prayer?
Before you say YES before the altar
How do you live?
In purity, or “anything goes”?
Get to know one another’s background
Or rather one another’s back?
In transparency, or behind a facade?
Planning for the future, or
Rather for the past and present
For better, for worse
To work best
The two need to be friends
FRIENDS I say
I will call it out for you
And you help me okay?
Give me an F
Let love and faithfulness
Never leave you
Bind them around your neck
Write them on the tablet of your heart
For Finance, watch it
Money lubricates the wheels of love
But it is a bad main backbone of the entire structure
Know that she who walks with the wise grows wise
Show me your friends, it is said
And I will show you your character
Give me an R
For Reputation, character
A wife of noble character who can find?
A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown
But a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones
Be unique, be distinguished
Give me an I
Giving way and satisfying the good desires
Of your partner
Be kind and you will gain respect
I for Industry, for diligence
Give me an E
Not Exulting, not proud
With humility comes wisdom
But when pride comes, then comes disgrace
Before his downfall, a man’s heart is proud
But humility comes before honour
Give me an N
Let nothing move you
Be steadfast in your determination
To make your relationship succeed
The YES is a promise
Which gives birth to a commitment
Which commitment must be seen
As a duty
Give me a D
For Devotion, for love
For affection, for friendliness
Love should be the foundation
Love must be the engine
That moves your vehicle of marriage
Give me more S’s now
For Sense, wisdom, discretion, prudence
Houses and wealth are inherited
But a prudent wife is from the Lord
Because she is wise, her speech is seasoned
The noble wife, who is difficult to find,
Speaks with wisdom and
Faithful instruction is on her tongue
S for speech
She who guards her lips
Guards her marriage
A gentle answer is her trademark
Pleasant words, which are a honeycomb
Sweet to the soul and
Healing to the bones,
For better to live alone on a desert
Than share a house with a
Nagging and quarrelsome wife
For better for worse
If you will be diligent
And apply whole body, soul and spirit to it
You will always better the worst
May this be your pledge
In your relationship
In your marriage
Good better best
May you never rest
Until your good is better
And your marriage best.